The Toy Myth

You want to know what the toy myth is?  It’s the belief we buy all of this ‘stuff’ purely for our kids’ enjoyment and enrichment.  This weekend has revealed the greater truth to me, however.  My kids don’t have toys for their benefit.  They have toys for my benefit; to keep them out of my ‘stuff.’  They don’t really want this juvenile plastic crap, they want my phone, my computer, my shoes and my jewelry.  In a fruitless attempt to avoid having to share my toys, I bury them in Fisher Price, Leap Frog and Disney.  The more gadgets and goodies I have and want to keep to myself, the more toys my kids end up with to distract and divert.

When I realized what was going on I felt a bit hypocritical.  If my kids don’t share their toys it earns them a trip to the naughty spot, yet not sharing my things seems perfectly reasonable and fair.  Of course my things are pricier and more fragile.  Sounds good, but it’s a bit of bunk.  The truth remains, I simply want what is mine to be mine.  I don’t want to have to share with my child.  As a mommy I’ve had to share what use to be my private time with my kids.  Good grief, I rarely get good bathroom time without having to couple it with reading a book aloud about barn animals.  So, no, I don’t want to share my tangibles.  They are mine, mine, mine.  I’m going to stomp around, throw a fit when my things are touched and continue to throw tons of “made in China” gear at my children.  If that means I’m being bad, put me in the naughty spot and let me have some quiet alone time to think about my behavior.  I think it is supposed to be 2 minutes for every year you are old.  That’s an hour and 15 minutes of ME time.  Bring it on!

3 Responses to “The Toy Myth”

  1. Cathy says:

    Girl. I just finished playing hours of Lego Batman while making my kids watch and not letting them play hahaha. It’s MY game, damn it!

    Now, before you think I’m mean – that thing arrived on Thursday and I played a total of about 90 minutes on it. Zack has played it daily since, so I wasn’t robbing anyone of anything.

  2. Tricia says:

    Oh, YES. I want to go on the naughty mat too. Isn’t it funny that so many of the toys look exactly like all the things we’re trying to keep little hands from nabbing. I’ve also tried giving my little guy recycled things…an old keyboard, a phone I no longer use…but, no, he still wants the real things–my things. I feel one of those tantrums you mentioned coming on quite strongly…must stop typing.

  3. Jen says:

    I’ve blogged about this before! I’m so the same way. To the point I don’t usually let my kids in my room. They are RUINERS!!!! I know it’s selfish and hypocritical, but damn it it’s MINE!!