Don’t Get Sick

Can you die from a cold? If so, I may be near death. My chest growls, I can’t hear out of either ear, the burning in my throat & nose is immense and I’m even annoying myself with my nonstop coughing. My jaw is too stiff and sore to talk! Horrors!!!

To spare my husband and infant daughter I’ve been sleeping on the couch at night to suffer the perils of this cold alone. Of course, my husband offers in a soft voice I should stay in bed where I am comfortable. He delicately protests my self-imposed sentence of couch and afghan. Interestingly enough, when I grab my pillow and make for the living room, he doesn’t leap from our bed and wrestle me down on the soft mattress. He doesn’t tuck me back under the covers and demand I convalesce in the soothing surroundings of our room. Nope, he rolls over, yawns and utters that he loves me and hopes I feel better in the morning. So much for my noble knight. I don’t blame him though. We can’t all lose sleep just because I’m sick. Tell me why I can’t hear a darn thing, yet I can still detect my husband snoring comfortably in our bed while one floor down on our living room sofa?

Back to being sick, what really is hard to get past is I have essentially had an intimate encounter with someone who doesn’t have a face. I have connected on a cellular level with someone, but whom? Was it my slobbery three year old niece who insisted on kissing me on the mouth? Perhaps it was the Hank Williams t-shirt wearing truck driver who grabbed the door handle right before me? Gosh I hope it wasn’t that shrill woman working the counter at the reststop hamburger joint we visited while on the toll road. She and I had no chemistry. I’d hate to think I actually let her get to 5th base with me. For my own sanity, I should probably shut this line of thinking off.

Yet again, back to being sick.  I really try not to be a germaphobe. It’s a constant battle and I’m a frequent hand washer as a result. When my mind starts to process all of the microscopic human debris circulating around me, it’s almost too much to take. That’s part of the reason I’m always amazed when I get sick. With the precautions I adhere to, it just shouldn’t happen. I suppose I should appreciate the fact I at least am not ill as often as others.

On a closing note, I would like to assure everyone I am doing my part to stop the cycle of unsolicited intimacy. I have remained at home, contained my germy output and have washed my hands regularly like a good girl. If anyone else gets sick, I am determined to be sure it is not from me. I do contend the world would be a better place if everyone took just a minute longer to wash their hands, made extra sure to have a hanky near by for that surprise sneeze and did their best to hibernate while battling the demon that is the common cold.

2 Responses to “Don’t Get Sick”

  1. Amy says:

    Hope you are feeling better soon. Hard to parent a young one when you feel like dying.

    Keep up the handwashing. I used to work in a group home where hygiene was not ideal, my hands were constantly washed and I was surprised at how seldom I was sick considering.

  2. beth says:

    Hey, Lisa, how’s it going? Sorry I haven’t been by.
    I too, am a constant handwasher and germaphobe. I know it is a lost cause to always keep germs at bay but I try especially with my kids.
    At our elementary, a grant was secured to install antibacterial gel dispenser in each room. I was very happy and as a result, the years we have had to close school because of an outbreak of stomach flu or respiratory flu has disappeared.
    I hope you get to feeling better soon and can indeed keep the rest of your household well.
    I’m sending blogger “chicken soup” to help you mend!